Tomato Bisque, y’all. May 27, 2012
Well, Big Deal!
Sometimes sincere, sometimes sarcastic
Rule10: You’re working hard. Be sure to hydrate.
Rule 9: For the love of Mike, can we all just agree to paint the ceiling and the wall the same color already?
Rule 8: Always wear the same jeans when you paint. Not because you only want to ruin one pair of jeans, but because they are an archive of your brilliant work.
Rule 7: Paint around that 3M hook holder. It’s not as easy to get back on the wall as the commercials tell you it is.
Rule 6: If your plaster wall has seen better days, choose a vaguely Mediterranean color and slop the paint on the wall. Tell people you were going for a “Tuscan cottage effect.”
Rule 5: Use your wall prep and painting time to practice everything you learned from Mr. Miyagi.
Rule 4: Make the wall look as bad as it can as long as it can. Anything you do will surely be an improvement.
Rule 3: (See previous picture) Ask your color-blind husband’s input on the color. If you don’t like his choice, explain why he is wrong, using phrases he won’t understand. “That yellow reads too green.” “The undertone is too red.” if you like his choice, great! You can blame his disability if it looks bad on the wall.
Rule 2: If your husband tells you he plans to tear the wall out sometime, take it as a sign to choose the boldest color you like in the cheapest paint possible.
